Change; Why its so Hard and How to Make it Easier

       I've been thinking a lot about change, and I'm finding that it's really really easy to get caught up in the idea of it. Change is exciting or scary or both. It's something we want to do, or don't really want to do but have to. We hear Ghandi's words "be the change you want to see." It's January so maybe you made some sort of New Years resolution to change something in the new year. I love the idea of change, but tend to lose interest in the effort it takes for it to last. Maybe this is why I always seem to come up with the same New Year's resolutions. Why is change so hard? 
     I guess for one if change was easy everyone would do it, lol! I think Change is so hard because so often its a reaction to pain. We know we are in pain and we just want it to stop. Change born out of reaction tends to be extreme and unsustainable. Change born out of reaction tends to be frantic, and maybe a bit unfocused. You know you've gained 10 pounds over the holidays and you want it gone, so you go on a detox diet and spend five hours a day at the gym. Sorry, that was the best example of extreme change I could come up with at the moment, lol! So often we want change but don't examine why we want the change. What is the intention behind changing it? Why is this situation you want to change in your life to begin with? What is it trying to teach you? Taking the time to detect what triggers the behavior, pattern, or habit you want to change. This is the step that is so easy to not do because it requires us to slow down and embrace the issue, and really look at it instead of running from it. Trust me, I'm a fast runner but these things have a way of catching up with you. There is a quote that I saw the other day. Can't remember who said it, but it goes along the lines of we repeat the same situations in life until we learn what we need to from them. Sad but true :) 
      I think another thing that gets in the way of making lasting change is that its tempting to take bounding leaps towards the goal instead of baby steps. The bounding leaps become overwhelming and are not yet supported by our minds, and our nervous systems. Think about it. If you have a habit that you repeat on a daily basis, but know you want to shift because its is impacting your wellness. You aren't repeating it because you are weak or unable to change. You are getting something from it. You adopted this way of being or behavior for a reason. Maybe that reason is no longer a part of your life, but tell that to your nervous system. I think we approach change sometimes violently. We forget to be compassionate with ourselves. I think away to be kinder to ourselves is to make sure we are creating goal for ourselves that are S.M.A.R.T. S.M.A.R.T goals are specific, measurable, attainable,realistic, and timely, meaning that they have a deadline. Creating a goal that is smart I think helps because you have to look at what you want to accomplish and make sure that the step you take meets the requirement of each standard. If it doesn't chances are its too big. If you have one little baby's breath of a whisper that you can't meet it make it smaller. Be kind to yourself! Go Slow!
      About that nervous system! A practice such a yoga can really help to bring the nervous system down off of high alert. The practice of yoga incorporates breathing, mindful movement, and my favorite, relaxation to help calm the nervous system which helps to forge new passage ways in the brain, supporting any new changes you are trying to make. It's pretty amazing actually! 
If you are playing with changes in this new year I hope this was helpful! As you move forward remember that you are so much stronger then you know! Be gentle and be kind to yourself. Have a great week! With Love, Annie